Once again...

Last day was a challenge for me, my mind was in havoc and the battle was hard. The battle was intense and I have gain some awareness from it.

I admit I snapped for few times and in those events I might hurt some people. However, the worst case yesterday was when I was on my way home last night. I met this brat (again), a bad behaved brat who forced people to accept his envelope. He forced the passengers of the bus to accept his envelope, hoping that there might be (and there are…) some that will put some money in it. And when I wrote “force”, I mean it. Even if people refused to accept it, he will push and leave those envelopes; he even boldly put it in people’s pocket!! Such brat -___- and he has no manner at all…after he done he will walk around and collect his envelopes without saying “Thanks” whatsoever and mock people that feel offended of his behavior. To be honest, this brat wears good clothes; he even wears brand new shoes. So…why would he do that??? 

Let me share my thought at that time…

I want to kick him, push him down or throw him out of the running bus. I want to slap and yell at him, I want to rip those envelopes and throw them away from the window in front of his face. In the end, I have a desire to kill him. Well…to be precise, to hurt him real hard and make him regrets his birth -_-

 If…

I let my emotion to control me and do what I was thinking without trying to control it. I might have killed him and some street thugs might come after me because of my stupid action.

Nevertheless, I prayed in my heart and confessed it all. I do not want to lie, I told God about what I was thinking and I acknowledge my hatred to that boy. (You can’t lie to God anyway so why would I keep it and acting like a saint with a good heart? I told God the truth and He fixes my heart!)

Then a thought came out. If I were to follow my emotion at that time, I am no different than the devil. 

The devil deceives human to follow their emotion, to satisfy their soul without thinking of the consequences. If you want to drink alcohol, just drink it! If you want to have sex, just go for it! You are human after all, it is human! Just do it to please yourself, get those pleasures while you are in the world, satisfy yourself!

What a lie -____________-

The world is a temporary living place. Because the time is limited, human must search for God; instead of following their fleshly desire and get in troubles.

Then Sis reminds me… (Thanks God for using my sister to tell me this). Heaven and hell is real, why would I sacrifice my spot in heaven just because of a brat?

Simpler way is, why would I get into trouble just because of a brat? Just push and control that rage and I’m getting into no trouble—safe and sound in my room.  

In the end, managing your emotions is the first step for everything—avoiding problems that caused by some exploding emotion (lol).

 Furthermore, the mind of a person is a war zone. With controlled emotions, the battle will be easier. And to be able to managing the emotions…Jesus is the answer.

Once again, I was reminded that the key of salvation is Jesus…